Well, well, well. Another season has ended, which means I’m contractually obligated to post another eyebrow countdown. Just like with every other anime season, I’ve completely neglected to cover anything as it aired…BUT, I did take note of some sexy, sexy eyebrows. And by sexy, I mean “delightful and attractive in a non-sexual and lawful way,” because I’m realizing now that most of these brows are attached to underage characters. Boy, this one’s off to a great start, huh!
If you’ve missed the other eyebrow posts, let me give a brief synopsis: I love a good anime eyebrow. The meatier, the better. Though it doesn’t all come down to thickness…sometimes, a particularly expressive eyebrow is enough to warm the cockles of my heart.
Also, the best brows forever belong to Tsumugi Kotobuki, and she will never EVER be topped. Now that that’s out of the way, let’s get to the list.
#10 Fuu Sagami – Release the Spyce
What these brows lack in thickness, they make up for in expressiveness. Fuu is a great character who loves to brag about herself, sass others, and pout. This could make for an obnoxious character, but thanks to those versatile eyebrows, viewers everywhere couldn’t help but fall in love with her. That’s the power of the brow, my friend.
#9 Yamaneko Arthur – Hangyakusei Million Arthur
This one was nominated by our local anime girl expert and aspiring eyebrow connoisseur, Cactus Matt. The eyebrows on her are quite formidable, and help sell that piercing angry stare. The thicker the brow, the better the scowl. Though they’re not the best I’ve seen this year, they deserve points for their purple hue and subtle yet effective arch.
#8 Borr – SSSS Gridman
If there’s one thing I’m a sucker for, it’s those angry nubby eyebrows. I have no clue what these are supposed to signify, really. Whenever they pop up, I imagine that the character overplucked their brows and are now perpetually angry because of it. It could be why Borr is constantly kicking Utsumi in the shins – his long eyebrows could be a reminder of what Borr has lost…
Regardless of whether they’re plucked or natural, the shortness of these eyebrows sell that angry shtick all the more. Their important addition to the character design earn them a spot on this list, but unfortunately, they must be ranked low since they seem to be incomplete brows.
#7 Dwarf – Goblin Slayer
He might be narrow-minded, but his eyebrows sure aren’t narrow! …let’s pretend that joke worked, okay? Anyways, I didn’t watch Goblin Slayer because of course I didn’t, but I did see these eyebrows in passing and had to stop to take a long gander at them. I mean, DAMN. I respect a good old man eyebrow, especially ones that are girthy enough to extend BELOW THE CHEEKBONES.
#6 Um, I Guess This Kid From Karakuri Circus
Listen, I’m not going to lie to you. You know how it is. Every season, I go to write this list and realize I haven’t seen enough shows to make it compelling. Soooo, I scrub through anime profiles on MyAnimeList and look for some thick bois. Which is what I’m doing with this one right here. But, hey, they’re some impressive eyebrows, right? Blah blah blah Karakuri Circus exists, let’s move on and hope you just skipped this paragraph. No one really reads the paragraphs for listicles anyways, right?
#5 Lily Hoshikawa – Zombieland Saga
Lily’s eyebrows have everything I loved about Borr’s, but with some added thickness. My beautiful zombie daughter has the stubby nubs that win me over every time. Their perfect triangular shape, sky blue shade, and the way they float above her bangs earn them a place in the top 5.
However, just like with Borr’s brows, I regretfully must deduct points for their length. As much as I love the nub, I cannot in good faith let them win over a stronger and longer eyebrow.
#4 Giorno Giovanna – JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure Part 5: Golden Wind
Truth be told, it was quite difficult to narrow down one JoJo’s contender. Pannacotta was close to earning a spot on the list, but his bangs obscure his perfectly arched blonde brows. Giorno Giovanna, on the other hand, knows the strength that his eyebrow hair possesses and makes sure his lowly head hair does not get in their way.
Giorno’s eyebrows give off a menacing look, yet that blonde tone manages to give them a certain softness. We know he’s tough, yet we can also tell that he’s a good person. The multitudes within those golden eyebrows make them a worthy addition to this season’s round-up.
I must also give an honorable mention to this kind but unlucky janitor. May his eyebrows rest in peace.
#3 Saki Nikaido – Zombieland Saga
I try to avoid having two finalists from the same series, but Zombieland Saga was just too full of eyebrow goddesses. Not only are these eyebrows of impressive size, they do such an excellent job of showcasing Saki’s volatile yet endearing personality. Saki might be a tough dead biker chick, but she’s got a big heart…and a big set of eyebrows. Yes, these are a perfect example of the exact eyebrows I crave.
#2 Chihiro Kunisaki – Hinomaruzumou
Determination. Strength. Thickness. A dash of naivete. These eyebrows are the epitome of sports anime. Though Hinomaruzumou had plenty of stunning sumo eyebrows, Chihiro’s are the most powerful, without a doubt. Notice the way that they permanently arch. Normally, that downturn would indicate fierce anger, and while Chihiro is indeed fierce, we can still tell that he’s a kind goofball underneath all that brow.
Another point of praise is the way these eyebrows taper off at the end. He has the opposite problem of Borr – Chihiro seems to NEVER pluck these bad boys. Somehow, though, the scraggle works for him. Chihiro may not be the MMA champion he wished to be, but I can confidently say that he IS an eyebrow champion.
#1 – Literally Everyone in Golden Kamuy
Holy shit, does this series have a good cast of eyebrows. It’s a sin that I didn’t mention any of these beauts last season. To be honest, I could have made this Top 10 list exclusively Golden Kamuy characters!
In general, I want to give Golden Kamuy props for having a variety of unique looking character designs. The series really seems to love big, strong, manly men and showing off their muscular bods. These ultra-masculine men also have godly eyebrows. And to be fair, it’s not just the men with great brows – Asirpa has thick blue brows that compliment her wild facial expressions.
Congratulations, Golden Kamuy! You’ve won the most distinguished anime award.
Take that, Crunchyroll Awards!
Of course, no best of list can be complete without a set of honorable mentions. Instead of shouting out the eyebrows that almost made it, I’d like to take a moment to gaze upon the brave souls who have appeared on-screen completely eyebrow-less…and yet they somehow manage to make it work.
Fall 2018’s Best Nigh-brows
Thank you for joining me in this extremely important and very professional countdown. Literally, WHO needs critical analysis or reviews with “”substance,”” am I right?
Let me know if there are any good eyebrows that I’ve missed. Since I was a little late with this one and the Winter 2019 season is already well under way, let me know if you’ve seen any beautiful brows in the new seasonals! Maybe I’ll actually prepare a list for Winter 2019 ahead of time 😉
but probably not! 😉