The Great Ketchup Cake Caper of Magia Record

Part of the appeal of Shaft’s animations is that there is ALWAYS something going on in the background. It makes for great re-watchability. Once you’ve watched a new episode of the studio’s Magia Record: Puella Magi Madoka Magica Side Story, rewind, turn those subtitles off and look for pendulums swinging symbolically in the background. Check out the hidden details of a Witch’s Labyrinth, or see if any street signs start displaying tidbits about a characters’ emotional state.

Or, go rewind because THIS GIRL JUST PUT KETCHUP ON HER CAKE. Yeah. Are you seeing that screenshot? That’s for sure ketchup, right? And then, to make matters worse, it seems that she’s decorated the ketchup swirls with…candy and a wad of meat? Excuse me?

It can’t be some kind of meat pie, right? Then there would be beef pouring out the sides or something when she cut into it. Another troubling thing is the fact that there doesn’t seem to even be ketchup on the table. Does she have a secret stash of ketchup on her at all times? Lastly, none of the other magical girls seem to react to her decking her cheesecake out in ketchup – no one except for the newbie, Iroha, anyways. This leads me to believe that this is a regular occurrence. She must be dousing things in ketchup so often that her friends don’t even react to it anymore.

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WHERE DID IT COME FROM??

A few others have speculated on this odd phenomenon. Scott posited that maybe she’s eating a potato cake somehow. Remy gives the impression that she might just be a monster, like theYouTube lady who puts ketchup on her French toast. K at the Moviespoints out that she should just cut out the middle man and eat one of those Canadian ketchup cakes.

In all likelihood, it’s just a clever visual gag from the people who brought you similar fast-paced visual comedy in the Monogatari series. I love the idea of a conference room full of creators and animators being like, “yes, as Momoko is detailing the logistics of Witches, have this girl do some goofy shit in the foreground like putting ketchup on a cake.” Once again, Shaft is proving that they’re on another level, because they have the power to make me pause an important scene just to marvel at small details.

This anime is based off a game, too, and I gotta be honest – this mystery is making me want to download the mobile app just to see if this girl does more things like this canonically. Guess that’s just part of Shaft’s genius, too! Get me to download a game off of a freaking ketchup gag!

Great, now I definitely am going to play the game to learn more about this girl…

Keep Your Hands Off Eizouken! Helps Us Crusty Adults Tap Into Our Childhood

One of the things I miss the most about being a kid is just…being able to be alone. I miss being able to sit in the quiet darkness of the early-early morning, wrapped in a blanket, watching anime or playing video games. No expectations, no responsibilities awaiting me the next day – just me and whatever new world I’ve chosen to immerse myself in.

When I think of being a little kid, I don’t so much think about friendships or family Christmases. I think about the oasis that was my Mom Mom’s computer room – being able to sneak upstairs late at night to watch Naruto on YouTube and having nothing else but the hum of the air conditioner and my little sister’s light snoring to keep me company. Or, I think about those nights spent watching [adult swim], falling asleep as Detective Conan fades into the early morning shows like Baby Looney Tunes.

I mean, I can still stay up late, I guess – if I want to risk ruining my work day the next morning. It’s not really as fun, because, you know, by one in the morning I’ve realized that I’m about to ruin my sleep schedule for the week. The immersion isn’t quite there anymore – I can’t seem to fully divorce myself from Real World Bullshit anywhere near as easily as I could when I was a kid. Hell, even as well as I could when I was a college student.

There are two reasons I started thinking about the freedom of childhood cartoon-watching and video game playing. One was that my recent winter break from the office allowed me to lose myself in the world of Death Stranding until three in the morning. It’s been a looooong time since I was able to explore a video game world for so long, without having to feel guilty about it. The other reason was the premiere of the new Masaaki Yuasa anime, Keep Your Hands Off Eizouken!

Continue reading Keep Your Hands Off Eizouken! Helps Us Crusty Adults Tap Into Our Childhood”

Nujabes, [adult swim], and Cowboy Bebop: How anime influenced my music taste as a kid

Have you ever found yourself watching a movie or listening to music and wondering how your tastes got to be what they are today? I enjoy mapping out my own taste-makers in my head: it’s fun to think about how one thing I liked as a kid would kick-start a full investigation into a new genre, a new niche, a new world.

I’ve been listening to a lot more new music lately – well, new to me, anyways. My desk job graciously allows me to listen to music as I work, so I’ve been seeking out more things to fill those eight hours with. I’ve been listening to lots of atmospheric stuff, lots of hip-hop and jazz, and lots of Japanese noise rock and J-pop influenced artists.

One day, I found myself wondering, “what makes me gravitate towards this type of music?” Most of my teenage music taste consisted of emo and scene kid music – stuff that I mostly can’t stand anymore. Where did this blossoming urge to listen to completely different music come from?

And then it hit me. So much of my current music taste has been greatly influenced by the anime I watched as a young kid.

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Real picture of me, age 10, discovering the world of anime music. No, it’s not Lain, it’s me

Continue reading “Nujabes, [adult swim], and Cowboy Bebop: How anime influenced my music taste as a kid”

Killer Nun | Shlock Footage

HELLO ALL. I promise I will watch an anime again…some day. And maybe, when I watch one, I’ll even write about it, too. But in the meantime…I watched another goofy and horny horror movie. Please read my words about KILLER NUN!

TEHBEN.COM

Ah, the holiday season. Mariah Carey and ABC Family’s time to shine. Time for eggnog, snickerdoodles, cuddling by the fire, and general wholesomeness…or so I’ve heard, at least. Truth is, while you and your family are sitting around watching claymation elves, seasoned degenerates like myself are watching LESBIAN NUNS DO OPIOIDS. Santa gave up on the TehBen crew long ago – all we get from him now is coal and the occasional Dollar Store coupon for toxic-waste colored Mountain Dew. All that being said, he won’t care if we celebrate Jesus’s birthday with a little nunsploitation. So gather round the yule log and let me tell you about Giulio Berruti’s masterpiece, KILLER NUN.

Sister Gertrude (Anita Ekberg) works as a nurse at a convent, and she’s been having a rough time ever since she had brain surgery. Her memory has been failing her, she’s irritable, she’s developing an…

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Cellar Dweller | Shlock Footage

Happy Halloween!!!!!! I’m still slacking on anime watchings, but I do wanna share this thang I wrote about the late John Carl Buechler’s low-budget straight-to-video/laserdisc romp, Cellar Dweller. CHECK IT OUT!!

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Work is stressful and poopy, and whenever I return home, I just don’t have the brain capacity to do anything but watch direct-to-laserdisc horror movies. Lucky for me and all my fellow degenerates, movies like that are REALLY easy to find online – I guess no one’s really that concerned with doing copyright takedowns on these bad boys, huh?

My most recent B-movie find was Cellar Dweller, directed by John Carl Buechler. It was a bittersweet discovery – Buechler sadly passed earlier this year from prostate cancer. It feels like a fitting tribute to settle in and watch one of his flicks during the Halloween season.

Let me tell you a little bit about Mr. Buechler. The dude rules. Not only has he directed cult classics like The Dungeonmaster and Troll, but he also did the special-effects make-up for the Re-Animator franchise, Ghoulies, and more. He’s even worked…

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Anime Escapism, or why my depressed ass watched so many Japanese cartoons

It’s been a long time since I’ve actually sat down and watched any anime. My anime-viewing habits are pretty fickle. I either binge watch ten series all the way through in a month, or I don’t watch anything other than snippets of whatever shounen my boyfriend’s watching in the living room.

Maybe it was a bit foolish to start a whole anime blog based on such a spotty interest. It’s not that I like anime any LESS during my dry spells…it’s just that I really only gravitate towards anime when I’m in need for some hardcore escapism.

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That’s me, escaping my problems

Continue reading “Anime Escapism, or why my depressed ass watched so many Japanese cartoons”

Jenn’s Scary Movie Collection | Shlock Footage

HEY!! Remember when I said I was going to try my hand at writing some non-anime stuff? Well, I did! Check out this movie review I wrote up for TehBen. I intend to write more stuff for them in the future, so consider giving the page a follow, too! 🙂

TEHBEN.COM

On the top floor the towering pink and purple TehBen office building located somewhere between Colorado and Maryland, a fed up Associate Editor is flipping through documents. With an ever growing pile of crumpled papers and bad ideas, he takes to his notepad to draft a letter to a promising young nerd with some questionable interests…

Dear Jenn Coulter,

TehBen.com is in dire need of your assistance! I’ll be blunt, we’re just about out of ideas. With our editor Ben cooling his heels in Mexico after that unfortunate steamroller/clown parade incident, and with the door to Nelson Rockingham’s sex dungeon being jammed by an umbrella, I feel it’s finally time to turn to some new talent for help. From what I’ve seen on your blog and on twitter, I can only hope to put you to work for our readers before the FBI catch wind of your lurid…

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Top 10 Anime Eyebrows of Summer 2019: Return Of The Brow Inspector

I’ve really fumbled the eyebrow bag this season…well, the past few seasons, really. I gotta be honest with you, I have not watched shit lately. I’ve caught some Dr. Stone and Fire Force in passing via my boyfriend watching it in the living room, but that’s about it.

HOWEVER. Dr. Stone characters ALONE have some truly inspirational eyebrows. Taiju has the kind of thick fuzzy peaks that would make Groucho Marx jealous, and Senku’s lightening accents above his eyes electrified me. Those beautiful silken strands pushed me to put my Female Eyebrow Inspector glasses back on and give the people another definitive Top Anime Eyebrow list.

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“Hey Jenn, what have you been up to?” “Not much, just watching short films about talking penises and vaginas.”

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Whoa! Long time, no post! I’ve been slacking in the anime-watching department – in fact, I don’t think I’ve actually finished an anime series or even watched an anime movie in MONTHS. It makes it pretty hard to upkeep an anime blog when you’re either watching a million anime at once or abstaining from it completely. I’ve been reading about anime, sure – I haven’t logged on here in a bit, but I’ve been lurking what you all have been sharing on Twitter and popping on to check out your opinions on the seasonals and whatnot. But I just haven’t been in the mood to actually watch or talk about any anime stuff myself.

But you know what I have been in the mood for, apparently? Watching animated short films about dicks and vaginas!!! I started using Letterboxd recently, and I keep stumbling upon movies that I had never even heard of before. I’ve fallen down a hole full of obscure animated features and shorts, and somehow stumbled upon a glorious grouping of experimental animated shorts featuring singing, purring, sprouting, and dancing private parts. Please, let me regale you with my finds!

NSFW from here on out, obviously.

Continue reading ““Hey Jenn, what have you been up to?” “Not much, just watching short films about talking penises and vaginas.””

My Favorite English-Language Anime Rock Songs

serial experiments lain music yoshitoshi abe

There was something badass going on in the world of late 90’s/early 2000’s anime soundtracks. A decent amount of anime had these anthemic, sweeping rock songs in their soundtracks. Often, these songs were sung in English and performed by non-Japanese singers. I don’t know if this was because Yoko Kanno was out in full-force during this time period and giving us Steve Conte-fronted goodness, or if more anime studios were going for crossover appeal with Western audiences.

Whatever the case, these songs are all awesome, and the story of how some of these English language songs and collaborations came to be are actually very interesting. Originally, I was just going to do a quick listicle, but I got carried away reading about these various performers. It seemed like a disservice not to share all the fruits of my research, so here is part one of my surprisingly long list of favorite English language anime rock performances.

Continue reading “My Favorite English-Language Anime Rock Songs”